Monday, on October, 06th 2008
Oh, and strange autumn at us this time
.
To me it is direct to embrace and cry it would be desirable =). Well this such - tops of trees already bald stick out, and green crones are closer to the earth still! It even to photograph it is impossible, it turns out ridiculously and ridiculously. Somehow all not so. Though, leaves fallen down much, rustle underfoot with gold gratuitous. Carpets...
Verses Were recollected:
I go on leaves gold,
Under feet thrown carelessly.
The bitter smoke flies grieves,
And a dream zabvene it is inevitable.
To us autumn last sins
Will release, in a way blagoslavljaja.
Palm of the stretched hand, -
And I will stop at edge:
Between today and yesterday,
Between I love and I hate,
Between two destinies of pages book -
Autumn leaves two wings.
Bjaka
For a long time them subtracted somewhere, very much-very for a long time. Still when was not in Russia of the Internet (well or nearly so was not), it was year, approximately, ninety ninth. In the newspaper at that time people conducted dialogue like present internetnogo. Here from the newspaper these lines and styreny. Who such Bjaka and where it now?. If the nobility...
@музыка: Agatha Christie - the Second Front
@настроение: the nostalgic
@темы: , ,
Sunday, on October, 05th 2008
Yesterday to me the idea has come to a head to get other diary. In which I will be disgusting, shameless and places primitive (not always, of course, but I will be). I after all and such happen, but here it I do not show. In general, this question began to occupy me recently. People to madness are many-sided, and as try, in one diary to include all sides of soul it is impossible - the motley crew, absolutely not readable and nevosprinimabelnaja for associates will turn out. Leaves, that nobody can see my real face. Only a sex of person. Or even the third part (if not the tenth). And that who this part sees, hardly it would want to see other part, me in other foreshortening.
And in general, all to know about the person - means, to lose to it interest as it seems to me. Or me it is the truth only it seems? I live the grandmother and the grandfather of more than fifty years together, know everything, that only it is possible and it is impossible, about each other. And anything, it is good so live.
Really and I will once know someone to such degree?. And someone will know me. It is awful. I such bad if to consider all me in all its aspects)).
@музыка: has forgotten to include =)
@настроение: predponedelnichnoe
@темы: , ,
Friday, on October, 03rd 2008
If true one on everything, why the truth at everyone the?.
Still know for certain, true it or my truth.
@музыка: Linkin Park - Session
@настроение: the excited
@темы: ,
At first wished to write how I will severely revenge one director of the subordinated organisation that he has dared to raise the voice today in telephone conversation. But having thought, has solved - let lives. I all the same am better, than sometimes to myself I seem. All the same after all I will care of its office as diligently, as well as about all the others (them at me only eighteen). Let it will be on its conscience. When there is nothing to tell, is better to keep silent, and to fall to mad cries - only to show the weakness and powerlessness. And he perfectly understands it. Already for certain regrets about how itself has led.
@музыка: Picnic - the Hieroglyph
@настроение: meditativno-clarified =)
@темы: ,
Wednesday, on October, 01st 2008
I am simply obliged to note approach of October by separate record for I still expect to go on leave in December, and each new month is a minus month of expectation.
It is a pity, that yet November. But also for October of thanks. It was waited for a long time already, and here has come - today. And it is quite good, I wish to notice, has come. Even it is vigorous so. Time - and all.
Yes, nearly has not forgotten! I in October should
make zagran the passport. Necessarily. I will come here every day and to see this record. Gradually it will force to go and make me it.
@музыка: Sting - Shape of my Heart
@настроение: the excellent
@темы: , ,
Monday, on September, 29th 2008
Oh, it is not pleasant to me...
It was called man's anybody.
What next?.
Similar, further I will change also the diary name.
Only has not thought up while, on what...
And in general, it is an unhealthy habit. Yes-yes, it already a habit... The Third nik for one and a half month! No, I, of course, understand - illness makes itself felt, weakness there, whims everyones... But not to the same degree.
@музыка: Picnic - Nacre and a wheat grass
@настроение: Predatory. To bite somebody, whether that?.
@темы:
Sunday, on September, 28th 2008
All in any way I will not read up the book... Though, remains absolutely slightly. I already even guess, than business will come to an end. It is a little disappointed, if it is fair. Expected other from it. Though, something in it, certainly, is. Simply I not so love the mysticism. Though, "the Master and Margarita" - too mysticism. And I consider this novel as the most ingenious product of all times and the people. It because in it the mysticism covers deep sense, and in the modern book of depth the person I do not observe. There is no there either sense, or an idea. The reading matter and all is simple.
@музыка: Gipsy tunes
@настроение: as it should be
@темы:
Friday, on September, 26th 2008
Today me have fired home, have told, I will not recover yet that did not appear... And I to work to death I want, workaholism has attacked!
And here is how, tell, with it to struggle??? When to me laziness to work - me force, and when it would be desirable to become the leader of manufacture - drive from work... And where?! Home! To be treated. Yes I with the same success can be treated on work. Or they think, what I something especial will do houses to recover?. No. All same tablets, drops in a nose and other nonsense...
In general, there is no it a pardon, they have ruined my thirst of rough activity on a root...
Now here I sit, as the silly woman, houses. I am ill. And me it is lonely.
And it is sad.
And I to people want.
Also I want, that me regretted and surrounded with care. And there is nobody.
Here and all my sad history.
@музыка: Darren Hayes - Insatiable
@настроение: the offended...
@темы: ,
Thursday, on September, 25th 2008
Record about work and people. Sad. There is no need its superfluous people to read...
Now it is clear, yesterday the bad mood whence undertook... Today at me temperature and a headache. It seems, I have caught a cold. I wish to lay stupidly on a bed and to look in a ceiling, I will not wake up yet (the moment when I will fall asleep, all the same I I will not notice). And to wake up I want in the spring...
Why so it is impossible?.
@музыка: the TV in other room sings advertising...
@настроение: the suppressed... I am ill...
@темы: ,
Wednesday, on September, 24th 2008
I hope, it has not too badly turned out...At me bad mood. It wanted to change something... But time in global sense at night of anything to change it is impossible, has changed the diary
.
Now here I think, to open this record, to learn menenie people about new design or not to open?.
Actually my diary to anybody except me is not necessary (unless still to pair the person, but they can always write to me in u-mail) that is why I will not begin to open.
Everything to sleep... And that promised itself, that I will lay down in eleven evenings - where there, has again held on to two... It it is direct punishment any, washing magic figure. Before two it does not turn out to lay down in any way to sleep...
P.S.: I and have not found a glove, but have found a heater of which has taken advantage immediately. In a room at once it became warm and cosy. Why then at me bad mood, I will not understand?
@темы: , ,
I run into hibernation.
In such long anabiosis.
From a cold.
Could not find a glove, and a hand myorznut, as never. No, I at all in the street, I sit at home at a computer. But me it is persistent pursues sensation, that I in the street
. Only the wind is not present, and in the rest - in accuracy as in the street...
A lot of text I will not type, and that absolutely hands will wither...
Aha. And avatars my present just to a place. Zaindivela, as that animal... Also I sleep all time.
@музыка: no since the head is ill
@настроение: "to be or not to be..."
@темы:
Monday, on September, 22nd 2008
The closed record which has been not intended for public viewing
Sunday, on September, 21st 2008
Yesterday it would be desirable to write so much, but words persistently did not wish to be built in the harmonious text, and today as it is a shame to recognise it, began to write any more about what...
Unless about beryozovo-tram summer
. Only about it I will not write, about it I will lay out a photo:
here it.Will pass very few time, and I again will start it to wait and recollect, how it is fine, with izumrudno-sonorous foliage and freckles from golden hats of dandelions on each lawn, with warm rains and freakish figures from white cotton wool in the dark blue bottomless sky. Because I am not able to live without expectations. In the winter I wait for summer, and summer of winter. I always wait for something... Also I recollect...
Probably, it is bad. It is necessary to live for today, instead of future which has not come yet, and past which is already cunning. But me it is close in the present, I do not have not enough past and the future in each instant of my life... And to treat me, I am afraid, already late. I so never also will not learn to live a reality if till now has not learnt, and I fly by all and without that a short life between memoirs and dreams, in any klubnichno-vanilla clouds...
@музыка: Paul Mauriat
@настроение: klubnichno-vanilla, away grey everyday life!
@темы: , ,
Friday, on September, 19th 2008
To hell all. Has bothered. One in the field not a sparrow, and a nuclear warhead on start. There are no at me today words. One emotions. And all - entirely negative and explosive. It is necessary to be cooled somehow... Eh when already a skating rink will fill in on Dinamke?.
Actually, our city otlichetsja deficiency of places where it is possible to go skating in a warm season. I know two covered skating rinks which all year long accept interested persons, but in one of them I never have time to buy the ticket - I live unsuccessfully far from it. Tickets to sell begin at 11.00 on drivings which will be at 14.00 and 17.00, and thus them I snatch away instantly that is to take - it is necessary to come to cash desk opening. And me not in a trick then with 11ти hours to be wound on a city in expectation of necessary time. To go home - it is very far, then laziness to go again on a skating rink... Also it is impossible to buy the ticket for tomorrow, only to the day. The second is much more close, but to go for a drive on it the adult it is possible only two times week, both days - week, and driving time coincides with working when I work for the fatherland blessing... More shortly, I am tired out in a corner... It is necessary to wait for frosts only. But it so at a distant day, and without the fads I cannot any more... And how to be to me offended and malicious??? It is necessary to blow up all the same in the near future...
@музыка: knock of the indignant heart
@настроение: below a plinth
@темы: ,
Thursday, on September, 18th 2008
Ravens became at me a favourite theme.Today on a way from work, uvidav these wonderful birdies, I have instantly recollected a film "Night Patrol" in which there was really kolosalnaja a flight turning over a building. And so, the today's flight was in accuracy same, only turned not over a building, and over a five-copeck coin on shopping centre. Highly so they turned, and, in different directions: a part clockwise, and the others - against. Also croaked. Spitefully.
But not it has surprised me most of all. Not clearest - why people at all do not pay to them attention??? The same invasion any, they already have dispersed all pigeons from neighbouring court yard... Whether to it it became boring there where they lived earlier, whether them there have ceased to feed, but only clearly one - they live now in a city. And at me to them an antipathy. I karki on spirit do not transfer them...
And in general, strange they. Also behave suspiciously. Or it I hypochondriac?.
But I the truth never in a life saw so much raven in one place simultaneously (and in a city I in general never any ravens saw earlier). If such flight decides to attack people, will not seem a little. I, remember, somewhere read or looked on TV that there are places (in cities) where ravens do not give to people of pass - peck passers-by and spoil cars the claws...
P.S.
@музыка: Enrique Iglesias - Love To See You Cry
@настроение: to coldly me... The mood has frozen. I fall ill, it seems...
@темы:
Tuesday, on September, 16th 2008
This morning I have seen them for the first time (before heard every morning)...
It was a show out of the common, simply mystical any... In a life never saw so enormous flight. They also flied from wood, from Hehtsira, I think, anyway from that party where cities are not present. Silently flied, silently, a uniform live organism, the improbable sizes flight... The Frost on a skin from one memoirs.
Having reached a city, they have roamed over houses by which I went (here it is necessary to add, that I live almost on city suburb, I go by the most extreme vysotok further which only a private sector, and further away wood), and then the basic flight has gone to a file of houses in the heart of area. There they have disappeared from a field of my sight. But not all. Some raven remained in those court yard by which I go in the mornings, having roamed over them, birds have sat down. And here then them it became audible. They have begun the is grumbling-spiteful morning dialogue.
I cannot understand all in any way, with their what wind to us have inflated. Earlier never they flew in a city, lived on cemeteries yes in suburb on dumps... Residential areas were in the power of pigeons, sparrows and swallows. And here - ravens. Moreover so it is a lot of. Horror.
@музыка: 30 Seconds to Mars - A Beautiful Lie
@настроение: vorononenavistnicheskoe (!)
@темы: ,
Time flies so imperceptibly...
Still yesterday it seemed, that to this summer there will be no end. And today - from summer there were only letters, the yellow letters of the autumn flying to my cold palms. About, I so like them to read, with ecstasy to peer at freakish patterns, as if in destiny lines.
Mine?.
Perhaps.
All destinies of the world in these letters, read - and will become all-powerful... But to solve a pattern not under force the mere mortal. We will indifferently sweep away stacks of letters as unnecessary stuff, we collect in bags, we burn down in a flame of fires, leaving the ashes from hundreds and hundreds destinies...
Cool shades, prompt a wind, dark mirrors of heavenly tears...
Autumn. Remain for ever, I will not give you to winter. For what. I will read your letters, to search in reflexions of pools for your traces, to warm palms in sleeves of clothes and to enjoy you... Only you remain.
@музыка: Again "Spleen" - the God has got tired us to love
@настроение: is pensive-careless... I a moth flying on light...
@темы: , ,
Sunday, on September, 14th 2008
Imperceptibly somehow...
The ruler knowingly, without it I also has not recollected already as time flies.
However, unless it is term?. And me already almost all the same, that becomes with this diary...
It was necessary not to create at first a diary, at first it was necessary to grow roots on a site the reader. And then already and for a diary to undertake. Late this idea has visited me...
@темы:
@музыка: music of waves
@настроение: the indifferent
@темы: , , ,
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